Sorry it has been a while since I have made my last post! Life has got in the way.
Still have yet to make my appointment with my doctor. It’s for a new doctor because my last has left for Dunedin and this new one comes as a recommendation from my best friend. I haven’t had much luck with doctors since I have been diagnosed with depression. I have had several. I know it’s important to find one that feels right for you and so that is what I have been doing. After the earthquakes in Christchurch I found myself constantly getting up in the night to use the bathroom. Sometimes up to eight times! I felt like a pregnant woman or somebody with bladder problems! I know this was my bodies response to the stress and anxiety surrounding the events so I went to see my GP about this. She put me on sleeping pills. I hated them, they made me feel drunk and I would sway as I walked to the bathroom before getting into bed. I slurred my words and would pass out only to wake up a few hours later anyway. Plus it didn’t really resolve my anxiety problem. The real issue. I later found out that there was free counseling sessions for earthquake related stress which is what I really would have liked. I decided to leave this doctor and found a new GP that was closer to home. I wasn’t much a fan of him either. He was very evasive and once, when I was speaking to him about my depression, he answered a phone call during mid-speech to only be notified that someone had arrived. I found that disrespectful and unprofessional. He would also ask my opinion a lot, once asking if I had looked online regarding my symptoms. My last GP was close to my work which was convenient. Things were ok with her and she even managed to get me my free counseling (something not one of my other doctors had suggested to me), however before my holiday she made several errors on prescriptions of my venlafaxine, once, confusing it with antibiotics and also putting the wrong amounts on. I had to call the nurses several time, was made to feel stupid for something that was not my fault, and eventually had to write a letter to get through to them which my father delivered (at this point i had left the country). The medication was given to my father who brought them to me in south america last year. So, fingers crossed for my next GP!
It’s hard when you have depression and you have a doctor that is not right for you or doesn’t understand you. It’s hard enough to pick up the phone and get yourself an appointment. I have learnt that you need to push to get the services you need for mental health. You need to ask the questions. You need to write down your health issues on paper as once you’ve waited 45 anxious minutes in the doctors waiting room – all of what you were going to say flies out your head! I got used to being spoken to but then I learnt to speak back. I had to do my research about what I was entitled for. Sometimes I had to push for it. I have found a very good counsellor (one that suits me as those too are all dependent on your vibe with them) and I would have not found him had I not consistently asked for one. I wish it were easier. I worry for the people more vulnerable than me who suffer from extreme anxiety and depression who have no way of speaking up, only to go home later and cry because the appointment felt like a waste of time. I was once like that. I do know you’re allowed to take a support person to your appointment or even ask for one during your visit. I know this because I have taken the time to read about it. But it’s hard when you’re unmotivated and I totally get that. Maybe in time I can collate a list of things to consider when seeing your doctor regarding your depression. Another goal to add to my ever growing list!
In the meantime, I have a job interview tomorrow so I must prepare for that. Not anxious, just excited. Will be good to earn money again!
Take care,
L xxx